Lessons learned:
1) Always do round trip if possible. It's not worth the $50 savings to run the risk of being stuck.
2) American Airlines sucks. Most of the gate attendants were less than helpful in getting things taken care of; I was about to see how difficult it would have been to get from DFW to LAX via Southwest (not that much, $306 at the gate fare)
3) Texas sucks. It's hot and sticky and they don't believe in sidewalks. That state fails.
Anyways, I'm hoping to get to sleep sooner or later...I need it.